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Thursday, June 21, 2007

What NOT to say to make a pregnant woman feel better...

Husband: What are you talking about? You are beautiful!

Me: No, I am huge!

Husband: You are pregnant, I love you look like a keg with legs.

Me: ....

Husband: What? You are so cute, you're my little cute tubby butterman!

Me: ....

Husband: I love you.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Baby Shower

This post could also be titled..."Where I am I going to put all this stuff?" or "Could I possible get any fatter?"

It was such a beautiful shower. My mom, my husband's mom and his two sisters really did such a wonderful job. I am thankful to them all, but my sisters in law? They truly were amazing. All three of us have alot on our plates right now, life is overwhelming for a variety of different reasons. My older sister in law is pregnant 8 months pregnant, not to mention trying to sell her house and buy a new one. And the younger one has been having a hard time lately with something. To have so much going on, and still be so loving and supportive and...I don't know...sisterly. I can't think of what to say. Who am I kidding, I can ALWAYS think of things to say.

They got me all the clothes you see on the line, plus a laundry basket filled with toys and books and Dreft (which apparently is what you need to wash Butterman's clothes in...who knew? And to think I was going to just use Tide!). PLUS, they got me the infant car seat and an extra base. Plus a ton of other outfits and onsies and bibs and a big stuffed bear that isn't pictured...

Sometimes, I want to cry and hug them and let them know how important they are to me. (Other times, I want them to eat cheesecake and have pimples, I mean, could they get any more beautiful?) But they are my support in so many ways, which is weird, because I don't think they really know how important they are to me, I don't know if I have ever really told them.

I write alot on this blog about all the funny little stories of acclimation to being married. There is no greater part of getting married than figuring out and fitting into another family. And though I have a few stories I could tell about my inlaws, they have not once made me feel like I wasn't part of the clan. They are my family, and they make everything about the 'deal' of marraige so much sweeter.

My younger sister in law moved about 5 minutes away from us a few months ago, and soon my older sister in law is moving to our small town. I can't think of a better gift to give Baby Butterman than to have them move their families close to ours. To have Baby Butterman grow up close to his cousins, running into each other's homes for a quick cup of coffee, or to drop off a care package and give some hugs because something bad has happened...or to meet downtown at Gracie's for ice cream on a hot summer weeknight after soccer practice. Just to live our lives together, one big happy family. When the dust settles, isn't that what we are all striving to give our kids (and ourselves)? Butterman will be surrounded by this big, goofy, loving, crazy family.

So could they get any more beautiful? Yeah, actually, they could. Because while the picture shows you how pretty they are, how well put together and dressed they doesn't show you everything they do for me and for each other. It doesn't show you what kind of sisters they are.

I always knew I would marry him, I just didn't know how lucky I would be to get all of them in the process.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Scaring Kids and Kicking Puppies

The following email was circulated by the managing partner of my office when I got back from court yesterday after winning a trial:


Hi Everyone!

It has been a banner day for Newlywifed. She just won her trial after demolishing an 8 year old on the stand. Everyone make sure to congratulate her!
Great Job, Newlywifed!



The eight year old was a formidable opponent…I eventually won after she pointed to my stomach and asked if I was pregnant, and I told her "no, I ate the last kid who testified against me." After that, she folded like a house of cards.

Clearly I am trying to win mother of the year as a rookie. It's going well so far, don't you think?

*It should also be pointed out that the partner was joking (she isn't that insensitive as to think it is great to make a child cry) she's 8 months pregnant right now...and the child not testifying had very little to do with my win.

Monday, June 04, 2007

An Eternity of Happiness

Two Years, a beautiful wedding, a happy home, and a baby butterman on the way.

It has been the two of us, moving through life, stopping only occassionally to smell the new landscaping we almost died (or killed each other, depending on perspective) trying to put in. We have built a home together that, at the end of every day, is where we are trying to get to. Sometimes desperately. I don't try to get to a place, so much as get to him. He is home to me now, no matter where he is.

He has grown into the husband that I knew he would be all along, and I think I have become the wife I didn't know was inside of me. Somewhere along the way, the 25 year old who never called me back to plan a Friday night out because he got caught up with his friends, has turned into a 35 year old who drives his pregnant wife all the way to work every morning rather than have me take the train that is a block from my house, effectively tripling his commute.

We have stood next to each other, as we promised to do, in good times and in bad. There have been times that standing has not been enough, and we have had to carry each other. I held this man's hand when he buried his grandfather and he carried the casket of mine. I passed him a tissue when his baby sister got married, and together we welcomed my niece into the world on a sunny bright day one March.

I have watched him run into an emergency room, looking frantically for me as I sat in a corner hurting, and felt instant relief when his clear blue eyes found mine. I have hopped off an emergency room table, despite being the patient, to help him as he started to faint. He has brought me juice and water during the throws of the worst kind of flu, and I have unwrapped the bandages of his knee surgery wound and felt the pain it must have caused him as if it were my own.

We have gone through loss, and life together.

I have had the pleasure of watching his expression when he first saw his child on an ultrasound, and felt his hands waiting patiently on my belly for a sign of the life inside it.

In a few months, it will all change, and our family of two will become a family of three. It is part of our plans and hopes and dreams, and I wait anxiously for the arrival. But part of me knows that these first two years...these years it has been just the two of us, together figuring out how to move through the world, will have been some of the happiest of our lives. These two years are the foundation we will build all the rest on. And years from now, when we are rocking on our porch together, alone again after children have grown, I will measure the success of my life by whether or not I have earned the love he has given me.

Two years ago today, June 4, 2005, we stood facing each other, before God and all our family and friends, while the priest asked us to live life from the center. And we promised to do it. To be each other's center, and to live life from that place we would create. And while life has swirled around us, sometimes at breakneck speed, the center has always been calm. The center has always been home. It has always been us.

Thank you for all the lemon waters, all the laundry, all the driving, all the pizzas, every home improvement project. Thank you for working to make the world safer every day, for being my moral compass. For tucking me in at night, and holding me every morning for "five more minutes". Thank you for protecting me always. Thank you for laughing at all my jokes, and being my biggest fan. Thanks for telling me I'm beautiful just when my feet are most swollen and the shirt isn't buttoning.

You have been everything that I ever wanted and needed. You have been my center.

Happy 2nd Anniversary

love, me